In the calendar of the school activities twice a year, in October and March, there is an anti-bullying week, known in the school as Respect Week. What happens during the week? What is this program about?

In order to learn more about it, I asked the school if I could interview the working group involved in the project. In a couple of weeks the counsellors´ coordinator, Mrs Michelle Ehrler, organized a series of appointments with the school counsellors, the school psychologist and our Secondary school principal, Mrs Kiki Chatzivassiliadou.

The meeting took place in the Life Chatroom, a room where every day at some fixed school periods, students can meet the counsellors. It is a small but cozy room, with a desk, chairs, two armchairs, posters and a few plants.

The first appointment is with Mr. Alessandro Zangrossi.

Doriana Brunner: When did you start to develop this program? Which classes do you work with?

Alessandro Zangrossi: We started organizing this workshop at least 4 years ago. I work with S1, S2 and S3 classes. The most important value for me to convey during this workshop and more generally in my daily work with the students is Respect. Respect among the students, respect for the adults, respect for the environment, respect for the property of the school. The school belongs to all of us and I must do my best to keep it tidy. Respect means also greeting the adults, the school mates, the cleaning staff.

DB: How do you work with them?

AZ: My preferred tool is dramatization. Last October we recreated a cyber-bullying scene. The students acted and also made a video. Discussion is also important so I split them in groups where they can more easily communicate. They discuss, research and then create posters. Afterwards they present their work to the other school mates. They dramatize situations that may happen or have happened at school and by doing so they understand why that behavior was wrong.

DB: How is the level of participation like?

AZ: Always high. Also those who are normally less active are motivated.

It is time for the second appointment already. I have the pleasure of meeting the school psychologist, Mrs Stela Salminen. On behalf of the parents, I welcome her to our school and I tell her how glad we are that a psychologist, although on a part-time basis, has finally been appointed in our school.

Doriana Brunner: How can we define bullying?

SS: Bullying has three distinctive characteristics: it aims at doing physical or psychological harm, it is repeated on a regular basis, and there is a power difference between the bully and the bullied. Bullying can be physical or psychological, and the prevalent form varies in accordance with the age at which bullying takes place. Physical aggression is more common among pre-school children (2-5 years old) and during school age (6-9 years old). Students aged 10-13 use relational aggression more often, i.e., they may use verbal intimidation, name-calling, or make remarks on appearance, weight or clothing of other students. Between the age of 14 and 17 internet and cyber-bullying become the most common form.

DB: Is there a difference in the male and female behavior?

SS: When it comes to physical intimidation the percentage of boys and girls involved in bullying appears to be the same. However, relational bullying, which includes gossiping, teasing, planting rumors about someone, talking behind someone’s back seems to be more common among girls.

DB: What are the consequences of bullying?

SS: It has to be noted that there are consequences not only for the victim, but also for the bully. The victims usually report problems related to self-esteem, they may feel lonelier and unhappier, have difficulty in maintaining friendships, and in more severe cases they may suffer from anxiety and depression and even have suicidal intentions. Bullies, on the other hand, resort to drinking, smoking and anti-social behavior. Studies investigating adolescent crimes show that delinquents used to be bullies.

DB: What can adults do?

SS: Programmes like KiVa implemented in the Primary Cycle and the Respect week for the Secondary one are effective tools, but adults (parents and teachers) need to be alert as well.

DB: Are there signals warning parents about problems in the lives of our children?

SS: We need to observe children on a day-to-day basis. Important signals possibly pointing towards bullying may be the child’s loneliness, unhappiness, and crying. Normal habits of sleeping and eating may also change. It is crucial to talk and find out, in a most sensitive and empathetic way, what the reasons for such a change may be. When parents come across a case of bullying, they should take it with the necessary gravity. Brushing it aside with a comment “It is normal, you will get over it” is highly inefficient and may exacerbate the problem. The child might feel ashamed or guilty and become altogether discouraged from reporting any bullying incidents in the future.

DB: Is there a procedure to follow at school?

SS: There is an anti-bullying policy from 2013. However, students/parents are encouraged to report any problem to the class teacher or to a teacher they trust, one of the counsellors or the psychologist. Sometimes only talking to the bullies can put an end to bullying. Teachers may discuss the issue in a neutral manner (without mentioning specific names) with the whole class and apply different methods aiming at improving the overall climate in class. The counsellors and the psychologist, on the other hand, can focus more on work aimed at strengthening one’s self-esteem, building confidence and improving social competences, but bullying is not and should not be treated as a problem of the bullying victim.

The time is running fast and the last 3 meeting overlap.

The counsellors Mr. Bernard Mulligan, Mrs. Jutta Hollacher and Mrs. Michelle Ehrler (the counsellors´ coordinator) join me.

DB: Which is the aim of these workshops?

Michelle Ehrler: The workshops are part of Respect Week, during which the whole school and the teachers focus on the theme of respect in lessons. The workshops are specifically run by the school’s counselling team to raise awareness among the younger students in secondary. Each year these workshops focus on a different aspect. By means of videos, role-playing, and group work students discuss different aspects of bullying. This year the main focus was the role of the bystanders. It can be negative because they observe without interfering but it can be positive because they can help the victim. We gather all classes from S1 to S3 in the Aula and work together. The increasing number of students will force us to redesign the workshop for next year.

Bernard Mulligan: Students discuss among themselves, they become aware of the problems and they begin to understand that bullying is a community issue. Our policy is the no-blame approach. We try to understand what happened between the victim and the bully, we let them talk and sometimes this approach is enough to stop the bullying.

ME: If bullying persists, than Mrs. Chatzivassiliadou becomes involved and stricter measures are taken against the bully.

Jutta Hollacher: During the workshops we try to let them feel what it means to be bullied.

DB: Can being teachers and counsellors be a problem?

ME: Actually we are more efficacious in our role of problem solving when we are also class teachers because it becomes easier to manage the problems. But we encourage students to approach teachers with whom they feel more confident and explain to them what is going on. We also ask them to keep evidence of bullying on social media, such as messages to show us. We cannot control what happens outside of school but we feel it is better to solve the problems within the school community.

JH. I have visited classes with problems where I introduce myself as a counsellor and I encourage students to come and see me. In most cases just raising the issue within the class community is enough as the students say they have started talking among themselves and begin to understand more about their own behavior. If problems are tackled at the beginning there is a greater chance of their being solved.

I reach the Principal´s office for a last question.

DB: What is your message to the parents?

Kyriakoula Chatzivassiliadou: Talk to your children. If there is a change in their behavior, for example, they are particularly quiet, ask them why. Maybe something has happened and it is worth investigating. We also ask parents to be open and transparent with us. They should share with us what they know as only through a joint collaboration we can effectively solve the problems.

"Poetry to Go"

In the middle of Respect Week the school celebrated a unique day in the year. Tuesday 21st March was the International Poetry Day – a day when we should read at least one poem.

For the last few years ESF has celebrated this exceptional day by displaying many poems in all the European languages taught in the School. 17 doors were decorated and the students were invited to read, think and open their minds.

This year the students were also offered Poetry to go. SWALS teachers invited them to pick up a colored cup of coffee. Each cup had a piece of paper with a poem in it chosen from more than 10 different EU countries poets. For one day poetry dominated over other areas such as economics, computers and technology.